It is with a Great Sense of Pride and Hubris that the

Announces the Creation of

HIS New International Newsletter


www.CRETINworld.com

CRETIN World  brings to you the Divine
in current CRETIN Dogma and Doggerel!

Featured in our premiere edition is an outstanding
dogmatic examination of new paleontology discoveries
documenting the various ways
God embedded bones of dinosaurs
for paleontologists to find
and thus glorify God in his infinite creativity.

In addition, recent discoveries indicate that
DNA is based on a triple-helix configuration
rather than on the discredited double-helix.
This, of course, further confirms
that the basis of life is the Trinity,
and not dualism,
as certain heathen Eastern Philosophies assert.

---

Another of the fine articles describes the traditional teaching methods
used by the excellent British School System in the last century.

This system stressed rote learning of the basics
to insure that the students graduated with a complete knowledge
of individual facts and isolated concepts.

None of the new, humanistic, integrated, cross-discipline studies
(which is where the idea of "cross-dressing" first polluted our culture)
nonsense was permitted!

After all, we are all aware how critical it is that
we teach our children what to think.

---

In future editions of  CRETIN World 
we will be covering significant issues in:

Biology	"Did Adam and Eve have Bellybuttons?"
Quantum Physics	"Just Exactly how many Angels can   Dance on the Head of a Quantum Pin?"
Aerodynamics	"Angel Wing Configurations - Speed vs. Lift"
Cuisine	"Sacrament Tasting -   Food Fetish or just Symbolic Cannibalism?"

---

The accolades are starting to pour in:

Pres. George W. Bush
upon being read an advance copy of CRETIN World stated:

"Excellent publication!  After all, I've been a CRETIN all my life!"

In closing, with your help we can advance and spread the doctrine of CRETINism